Wednesday, January 4, 2017

Despair

I'm not suited to healing. My nature is to fight to save life with great vigour and energy. This healing with energy feels so passive  that my mind falls into despair and torpor. I've slept 6 hours straight two days in a row, twice a day.

Esp when the guides give no hope. I can't bear to heal when I know it's hopeless yet I can't ignore the suffering.

Maybe this is graduation. In the past, I'd yo-yo from great heights of hope to great depths of devastation when the animal I'm trying to save, dies. This, the guides telling me in advance of the hopelessness, is quite recent and I'm not sure it's a good thing because I'm not handling it very well. A lot of dogs are going unfed. But I'm not emotionally exhausted either. I think.

There's little to do. I'm washing the current leg with Epsom salt and warm water. The old dog licks it vigorously. I give him water and meds (mataji's gunpowder cm and drawing that they swear by) and laying of hands & prana when I can bear it.

The fur doesn't dry well so can't even do too much of that. He doesn't want a hot water bottle near his body so that's out.

Just waiting for death is awful.

I have to try something, the guides say feed herbs, but how? in milk? I've just boiled some and I'm going to try some now. They want me to give the mucilaginous basella. Let's see.
----
Yes, he's having the curdled milk with the boiled tips of basella and other herbs and oil. Perhaps I should stop the meat entirely and give this twice a day instead. The guides think these greens will heal him. (More even than prana and Reiki and homeopathy. At least in combo.:)


No comments:

Post a Comment